


Vanity Love

by Fanfic_Annie



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Developing Relationship, Emotions, F/F, Feelings, Intimacy, LGBT, Love, Vanity
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-09
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-06-07 18:42:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 17,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15225504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanfic_Annie/pseuds/Fanfic_Annie
Summary: A few one-shots about the love these two have for each other and what it means.





	1. But for tonight...

**Author's Note:**

> I had some stuff to say about love and what better characters to write about than these two. They're real and they resonate and their love story is beautiful. Just some little bits from me that try to dig a bit deeper.

She was lying when she said she wanted no strings. They both were. She didn't know it though. She wasn't consciously lying, not deliberately stringing the other woman along, but she was definitely lying. 

Neither of them questioned where she had got the idea of marriage from. A "Mrs and Mrs White Wedding." Certainly Vanessa had given her no indication of it. To move from a casual hook-up every now and again to suggesting that a lifetime commitment was on the cards was a big leap in anyone's book. But neither seemed particularly surprised by it. 

And yet there it was. Hanging between them. A thing. A big thing. Something she was vaguely aware of but wasn’t ready to grasp just yet. And so she pushed it away. Pushed her away. Testing to see how real it was. How strongly it already had her in its grasp. But never moving so far away that she couldn’t reach out and pull the other back in when she needed to. Always staying within arms reach. 

She was there for the taking but was nowhere near ready to see that yet. It was too big. Too life changing. To commit everything, everything, to someone you think you barely know. But somewhere inside she knew she was going to and she felt some form of comfort. 

It won't happen right now. Now she can play, explore, discover the other in safety. But she knows it will. Almost regardless of her own volition. When the time is right. When the stars align and there is nowhere left to hide. When she has no choice but to surrender to a force so much bigger, so much more powerful, than her. 

It was a feeling she could neither name nor recognise. And yet it had an unfamiliar familiarity. Finding the person with whom your soul is entwined for eternity, all time past and all time to come. And so earthly fear doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter. What matters is that you have met again, this time in this life. And that the path is set. 

But it was too soon for all that. So she agreed that tomorrow they would go to the pub, but for tonight......

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When they got inside Vanessa went straight to the kitchen to open a bottle of wine. Charity sat on the sofa, knowing that a line had been crossed, that they didn’t have to pretend it was just about fantastic and meaningless sex any more. They could take their time, talk, get to know one another. 

So they did. They started lightly, nervously, not really knowing where they were going. So they told cute stories of their children, their families. Safe territory. 

But slowly, their need to connect overtook them. They started delving deeper, searching, forraging, mining each other's narratives, questioning and revealing more hidden aspects of their lives. Relaxing, finding comfort in sharing the stories they told. Feeling like they were being listened to and heard. Maybe for the first time. Declaring themselves to the person that needs to know. Giving pieces of themselves, knowing that their secrets would be treasured safely in the other’s heart. Laying the foundations. 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When the conversation finally waned it was late. The couple looked at each other and realised that they were touching. Vanessa’s hand rested comfortably on Charity’s waist, her thumb gently stroking in circles, while the taller woman’s arm draped along the back of the sofa, her fingers laced in Vanessa’s hair. It felt so natural, so right. 

For a while they just sat and held each other’s gaze. Finally they met, in time, as if a bell had rung somewhere, and they were kissing. Gently, softly, delicately touching their lips together, finding different bits of their mouths to caress, small, quiet movements, as if afraid to unleash the passion simmering beneath. 

But slowly it rose. Their kisses got hungrier, their bodies moved together, their hands sought to hold on tighter, to pull the other closer.

Charity thought she had felt every emotion there was to feel about intimate physical contact with other people. But with Vanessa, no. She felt things she didn't recognise, way outside her experience. The pleasure she took from being with Vanessa wasn't physical. It existed deep within her, somewhere inside that nothing else reached. The physical touch was the gateway to another place altogether, somewhere Charity had never been. She thought maybe it was her heart.

Sex with Vanessa wasn't always about the carnality. Sometimes, quite often actually, it was, and then the passion overtook them and it was hurried, driven, hotly intense and loud. But the couplings that Charity found she enjoyed the best involved simple touch, the closeness of their bodies, the familiar intimacy of moving together like they had danced this dance so many times before. Vanessa made love with her head and her heart first, then her body. And Charity was learning to do the same.

The release that she got from these encounters was sublime. Starting from deep inside her root, tingling at the base of her spine, moving forward into her sex then outwards, coursing through her body, feeling the glorious sensations from the tips of her toes to the roots of her hair. Pure, energetic bliss. Radiating through her. Touching her soul, lighting her spirit, firing her heart.

Finally, she knew what it was. She understood. This was it, that thing that had eluded her for her whole life. She had found it at last.

Love.


	2. There's a glorious freedom in love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A morning cup of coffee provides food for thought for Charity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More musings on love.

Charity sits at a table in the corner. She glances over at Vanessa, chatting with Rodney as she orders their coffees. They've dropped the kids off at nursery and have come into the cafe for a quick 10 minutes peace before their working days start. 

Charity feels relaxed, happy. Funny really, given everything that's going on. Her life in so many ways is as complex and difficult as it has ever been, and yet it feels more stable, more manageable, more steady than in other times of turbulence. 

She hears Vanessa giggle at some daft thing that Rodney says, and smiles to herself. She loves that sound. She loves that woman. She knows that now. It's taken her a while to put a name to the feeling that's been with her for some time because she's never felt it before. 

It crept up on her slowly, mixing in with and slowly overtaking the lust that initially drew them together. It started as curiosity, a wanting to know the other woman and, more strangely, to show herself to her. A longing to see and be seen, in all her dirty, smart, sexy glory. A yearning to see how much she could reveal before it was too much and the other woman fled. And to keep doing it with a dawning hope and faint belief that she wouldn't flee, that maybe she'd stay.

Then came feelings of protection. Becoming acutely aware of the other woman's emotions and moods. Caring more about Vanessa's feelings than her own. Jumping to her defence against anyone that might slight her. Hurting, feeling actual pain, when Vanessa is not ok. Finding her inherent sensitivity, suppressed for so long, awakening and finely tuning into the highs and lows of Vanessa. 

After that came familiarity and comfort. Realising that she feels better when Vanessa is with her than when she's not. Finding it harder to relax into slumber on the (few) nights she sleeps on her own and waking up with empty arms, feeling bereft. Learning about the pleasure of non-sexual physical touch - the brush of an arm, the clasp of a knee, the gentle hand against her jaw or stroke of her hair. Her heart warms at the knowledge that Vanessa can't walk past her without reaching out to make contact with her.

And finally that extra thing, that deep feeling that takes everything to a new dimension. The stirring of the heart, that pulse in the belly, the pull of belonging. A profound stirring of the soul, like they connect on a deeper, more potent and definite level than she has ever experienced. When her vibrations slow and her body, mind and soul harmonise in peace. Then she feels as if they have known each other always, like they are meant to be. Forever.

She ponders the difference between love and pain. She thought love was an absence of pain. But now she realises that pain and love are close together. They both involve risk, uncertainty, vulnerability. And absolutely no control whatsoever. She mistook love for possession, because so much of her life has been about possession. Fighting to possess or be possessed. 

The irony is that possession doesn't even come into her relationship with Vanessa. Control isn't an issue. She tried it, in the beginning, and Vanessa made no bones about telling her to fuck off. Instead she told her she was there if Charity wanted her and would stay willingly, without coercion. If Charity asked. So Charity learned to ask. And has kept asking. And Vanessa has been there. Every time. And she feels more safety, more security, with Vanessa choosing to stay with her than ever she did with those she tricked into it.

Vanessa has continued to stand with her, support her, even when things have got nasty and violent. And she's learning to trust that Vanessa will stay with her, regardless. Its taken her a while to get there, but she is there now. Even when she shows Vanessa the dark, dark workings of her inner mind, the bleak landscape of her past, the hopelessness that invades her on a regular basis. Vanessa just sits, listens, and gives her reassurance. Comfort that Charity thought she never needed but now craves from this incredible, patient, fierce, lovely ball of sunshine. 

So she knows now that the difference between love and pain is trust. Vanessa has trusted Charity since day one. Sure, she knows she lies, she sees her hardwired reactivity when she thinks she is in danger. But she sees past that. She sees that underneath her battle-worn armour there is a soft and gentle person, deserving of love. And Vanessa trusts that person. So Charity is learning to trust too, both Vanessa and herself. To open up those boxes buried so deep in her. To give them oxygen, show them the light of day, and question whether they can still hurt her.

Vanessa helps her do that. Vanessa sees her and quietly questions her but never demands answers. She respects the places in Charity's mind where only she can go, where no one but her belongs. And mostly Vanessa just holds her in the times she dwells there, never pushing, never forcing, letting Charity be where she needs to be, on her own, but not alone. And never for too long, without bringing her back with a light touch, a simple word, a reassuring smile.

There's a glorious freedom in love, she thinks. She always thought love was a bind, something to tie you down and stop you being yourself. But the truth is, being grounded in Vanessa's love lets her fly higher than she ever has. She is becoming herself, without guile, without masks, open to the world, safe and secure that Vanessa will be there to greet her when she lands.

"Hey. Where are you?" Vanessa has brought the coffees over the the table and wants Charity's attention. Charity reaches over and puts her hand over Vanessa's, resting around her coffee cup.

"I'm thinking that when all this is over we should go away somewhere. Just the two of us. Maybe somewhere we've never been before. You know, to explore together."

Vanessa smiles. Vanessa has a million smiles for her, all with different meanings. There's the 'Oh Charity' fake exasperated one, the amused, funny-Charity one, the filthy 'I'm going to do unspeakable things to you when we get home' one (a particular favourite of Charity's) and then this one. The 'you're making all my dreams come true' one, which appears on the rare occasions when Charity speaks about their future.

"Oh right. What's brought that on then?" Vanessa enquires. 

"Oh, you know, Babe. You're quite a good girlfriend really, have to put up with a lot." She gives a shy smile. "And we agreed that this was supposed to be about fun, and we haven't really had a lot of that lately. So I just thought...."

"Fun sounds good. Before we forget what it is." She shrugs, narrowing her eyes. "We're ok, though, yeah?

"Better than ok, Babe."

"Well then, you're right. I do deserve a holiday. It's quite full on, being your girlfriend."

"Huh!" huffs Charity. "Just try being my wife."

A wave of shock flashes over Vanessa's face, immediately replaced with a happy grin. But she says nothing. Just stares lovingly into Charity's eyes. 

Charity smiles back, her eyes glistening. That's a conversation for another day, she thinks. She takes a sip of her coffee and sits back in her chair. She's content. She's happy. She's in love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for reading. Love to hear your comments.


	3. Tangled

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Post-coital tangled musings from both women.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really not sure if this works. I think of the word 'tangled' whenever I think of these two together and I wanted to see how far I could take it. Their bodies are tangled and I wanted their minds and thoughts to be all tangled up too. Let me know if it reads that way.

They lie on the bed, tangled together. They always end up this way, when the passion is spent. Bound together as close as they can get. Legs entwined, arms draped around hips and shoulders. Hands gently caressing a back, squidging a butt cheek. Torsos aligned. Lips lightly brushing against clavicle or nestled in hair. Skin on skin, hearts beating in harmony. The sweet, delicious taste of each other lingering on their tongues. Both lost in post-orgasmic bliss. Deep inside their own minds, unfettered and free to wander where they want. Just breathing in the moment, feeling love and joy and peace and satisfaction.

Charity's body feels amazing. God she loves having sex with Vanessa. Its the best she's ever had. By a long way. She doesn't call it love making - although she knows that's what it is. At first it was just sex, wild, passionate, incredible untamed couplings, out-of-time moments, stolen together, extra arousing for the thrill of possible discovery. And the denial of growing feelings. 

Vanessa is so in love she feels like she might actually burst. In these quiet post-coital moments she gives herself permission to feel everything she really feels for Charity. To love her completely, wholly, with every fibre of her body and every neuron in her mind. To lose herself in adoration.

Charity can admit to herself now that its not about the sex any more. Its about the expression, the closeness, the intimacy. Its about getting more satisfaction from pleasing Vanessa than being pleased herself. Preferring giving to taking. Its about these moments, holding each other and never wanting to let go. Its about the love, Damn it.

Vanessa loves being in love. She loves being a girlfriend, Charity's girlfriend. And with that, she lets her mind float into the future. The future she dreams of and hopes for. Moving in together, being a family, going on holiday. Picturing them at the alter, staring into each other's eyes, confessing their love, exchanging rings and committing to give themselves to each other for eternity.

Charity enjoys being a generous lover with Vanessa, gentle and considerate. Never selfish. She gets to express all the things she has never been able to express, to feel the things she has never been able to feel. That's not to say the sex isn't wild, they push each other to the limits of pleasure and pain and respond to each other like they are somehow joined. But underneath it all there is always tenderness, care.

Oh. Vanessa gives a little shake, bringing herself back. Keep it real Ness. Remember, this is a long game. Move at Charity's pace, ignoring everything until the feeling gets so big it has to burst into the world. Just be patient, she tells herself. Charity finds the truth eventually. Hang in there Kid, it'll be worth it. It has been, so far.

Charity knows what makes this so special. In the midst of their passion, she gives herself completely to Vanessa. No holding back. No guard. No barriers. Total openness, total abandon. She is frightened of nothing, welcoming everything, sensing an almost spiritual connection between them.

Vanessa's feelings for Charity run deep. Very deep. And they seep into all aspects of her. She physically yearns for her touch, always knows where Charity is in relation to her. She feels something missing when they are not in the same room, within touching distance. She is constantly on her mind - the first thing she thinks of when she wakes in the morning, and the last thing before she closes her eyes at night. Even when they are together at both of those times. And most nights Charity rocks up in her dreams in some form or another. 

Charity snorts. What the fuck is she on about? Sprirtual connection. Honestly. But the thought refuses to leave her brain. They do have a connection. A strong one. One built on trust. That's why she can give herself so completely in those moments. Because she trusts and is trusted. And that's why Vanessa is the best sex she's ever had. She sighs. She loves her. 

Vanessa sees the world now through a Charity lens. During her day, in her head, she recounts everything that happens to Charity - imagining the conversations they will have later. Figuring out what to tell her to make her laugh, or get irate on Vanessa's behalf, maybe get all protective towards her. 

Charity wants to hold onto Vanessa. She doesn't know how. She wants their connection to exist outside the bedroom, to reach its tendrills into every aspect of their lives. Their lives, together. She wants them to have a future. Their bodies fit so well and she knows their lives can fit that comfortably too. She wills Vanessa to stay.

Vanessa comes back to what she can feel, in her arms, wrapped around her body, folded into her. Charity. The softness of her body, the firmness of her grip, the things she can do with her hands, her mouth, her tongue. Oh God, the things she can do with her tongue. Charity has opened up a new world of physical pleasure to her and she never wants it to stop.

Charity nestles her nose into Vanessa's hair and drops a tiny kiss onto her head, inhaling the scent of the other woman. She smells of sunshine. She smiles softly to herself, because she knows Vanessa is her sunshine. Warmth, fire, healer, bringer of life. Vanessa has brought Charity to life. And she feels herself stirring again.

Vanessa sighs. Tightens her grip around the other woman momentarily, transmitting all she feels, hopes and wishes for them through her touch. She feels Charity shuffle in her arms, her passion rising again. Vanessa smiles to herself against Charity's breast. She'll never get enough of her. She raises her head and greets Charity's lips warmly, lovingly and ready for anything.

They feel everything, and say nothing.


	4. Her mouth, Oh God, her mouth.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vanessa and Charity wake up together the morning after the eventful week of 9-13th July.

Vanessa came to slowly. She kept her eyes closed and let her consciousness awaken, feeling good, no, great. The events of the last few days started to come back to her, and her natural good mood dampened slightly. She stretched gently, not to disturb the woman lying next to her. She glanced over, noting the swelling around her mouth that hadn't completely gone, and the faint bruising around her jaw. 

She felt a little frustrated, truth be told. Yesterday, had she not been so mad with Megan for cheating on her dad, she would have shaken her hand, preferably the one that had sent Charity flying into the rubbish. Because quite honestly Charity deserved a good punch. But taking Charity's mouth out of action meant that their making up had not been quite as special as both of them would have liked. Charity's hands were made of magic, but her mouth, oh God, her mouth.

She rolled onto her side and propped up her head on her hand, gazing at her wounded warrior. One good thing about Charity being out of action meant that she had had to use actual words to apologise (twice in one day, she chuckled to herself), forcing her to admit that Vanessa made her a better person and that she wanted to be with her. And would fight for her, no less. 

It was time to let Charity know that she forgave her and that they were good. Her dad, of all people, had told her so. She told him what Charity had said, the day before, outside the vet's, and he said not to blame her. He said her reaction wasn't her fault, that Graham's threatening behaviour had triggered her and that it wasn't surprising with everything that she was having to face. He said he could see how good they were together and that she shouldn't risk losing that, especially in defence of him.

She had put off telling Charity that they were ok, for a while, letting the other woman stew. No harm in that, she thought, but now its time to move on.

Charity was lying on her back, one arm stretched out to the side and the other next to her under the covers. Her mouth was slightly open and she was ever so lightly snoring. Vanessa lifted the duvet and moved down until her head was between Charity's legs. Vanessa breathed gently onto Charity's core. She felt the other woman stir slightly but she didn't wake. She lowered her face to cup Charity in her mouth, sucking in, oh so slightly, to arouse her nerve endings. Then she delicately drew her tongue along her, flicking it softly over her bud. She felt the other woman come to with a start, her hands landing in Vanessa's hair, pulling her head futher into her. 

"Ness," she sighed. 

Vanessa lifted her mouth slightly to mutter "Who were you expecting?" She heard a chuckle above her then another "Oh, Ness," as she lowered her mouth back to its original position.

Vanessa upped the intensity slightly and started to draw Charity higher, feeling the other woman's rhythmical response. As she felt Charity approach climax she raised her arm to take Charity's hand in hers, interlocking their fingers and gently squeezing, resting them on Charity's belly. 

Charity saw the gesture for what it was. Love and relief swamped her body, bringing her to her peak. Soft, gentle waves of pleasure pulsed through her, liquid sunshine coursing through her veins. She opened her eyes as Vanessa lifted her head to look at her. 

"Morning."

"Morning Babe. Nice way to wake-up, thank you. What did I do to deserve that?"

Vanessa just looked at her, and smiled. A sweet, loving, forgiving kind of smile. "Fancy a brew?" She rolled out of bed and grabbed her dressing gown. Charity made to rise, but Vanessa stopped her. "Stay there, I'll bring them up."

"Oh OK. Although aren't I supposed to be spoiling you?"

"You've got the rest of today to make things up to me," Vanessa's parting shot was thrown over her shoulder as she left the room and went downstairs. 

Charity lay back in bed, one arm nestled above her head and the other resting on her belly. She let out a long and deep sigh of relief. She had really messed up in the last couple of days. Rocking up to Vanessa's completely hammered, demanding sex, then publicly humiliating her father in front of the whole village. But Vanessa had forgiven her. She knew that now. And, God, was she grateful.

She had paid attention to the recent conversations. She heard what she had been told, by Vanessa and Irene. Respect, patience and emotional stability. That's what she needed if she wanted to keep hold of the good things. And presence, taking care of what's around her rather than reacting without thinking about the impact on those she loves. So that's what she'd do. She'd learn those things, and Vanessa would help her. 

"So." Vanessa entered the bedroom with two cups of tea, handing one to Charity and putting the other down beside the bed as she shrugged off her dressing gown and climbed back under the duvet. "How are you going to fight for me today, Charity Dingle?"

"Well. How about we start with breakfast in the cafe and take it from there ? And I might not let go of you all day." While neither of them were big into PDAs they had both felt strength in walking out of the pub holding hands the day before. Charity wanted to hang onto her, and wanted her to know it. 

"Hmmm. Its a start. How's your mouth?"

"Better. Maybe ready for a little road test." She turned to Vanessa expectantly. Vanessa moved in and kissed Charity lightly on the good side of her mouth. "How's that?"

"Yep, that's ok." 

Vanessa kissed her again in the centre of her mouth. "And that?"

"Mmmm, yep."

She kissed her again, harder. Charity opened her mouth in response. She involuntarily released a little gasp of pain as Vanessa's tongue accidentally swept over her newly-restored tooth. 

"Oh no, Babe, that's not going to work."

Vanessa hrrumphed. "How long did the dentist say until it was healed?"

"About 4 weeks." She looked apologetically into Vanessa's eyes. "Sorry Babe. We're going to have to think of some other ways to occupy our nights for a while." A look of playful lust swept through Vanessa's eyes for an instant and she smiled, the playfulness remaining.

"Oh well, breakfast it is then. Hmmm. What do I fancy? I think it'll be a big fat bacon buttie dripping with butter and ketchup," she grinned. She reached up to caress Charity's poorly cheek. "Porridge for you. Or maybe a smoothie." 

Charity's face turned into a pout. "Ugh. And then I can't even take you for dinner as eating's not really an option. You will spend the day with me though, yeah?"

"Mmmm. Yeah. Course. All day and all night, if you want."

"Oh Babe, I want."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed it.


	5. Make up, make up....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another morning with Charity and Vanessa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This started off as light and fluffy but clearly I had something else to say.

Charity sank back into her chair and picked up her cup of tea from the kitchen table. She heaved a sigh and absentmindedly took a sip, her mouth puckering up in disgust as she realised it was cold. She put the cup down and cradled it in her hands, staring into the brown liquid, her eyes following the white swirls of milk that had risen to the top as it cooled. 

She didn’t really know what had just happened. They’d had a nice morning, waking up in each other’s arms, getting the kids ready and out of the house, then settling down to have breakfast together. And then it had all kicked off. 

She’d made some stupid comment that was meant to be a joke but it wound Vanessa up and it escalated instantly into a fight, neither woman prepared to back down to calm the situation. In the end Vanessa had stormed out of the pub, with a vicious “just fuck off Charity” thrown over her shoulder as she left. 

Charity hated it when that happened. Usually they sparred well together, both enjoying the frisson that crackled between them. It was fun and it amused them. But sometimes, when hormones were at play, or one of them was a bit tense, or the fucking wind was blowing in the wrong fucking direction, it would erupt and then they’d rip each other apart, with cruel words and harsh intentions. 

In those moments they would get so lost in rage, forgetting everything in the charge of the fight. Kill or be killed. Not really even knowing why they were doing it, other than one of them having some destructive, angry energy to get rid of and not knowing what else to do with it. So they would throw it at the safest person they could. Ending up lobbing verbal fireballs at each other, trying to make themselves feel better, not caring what they say or how much damage they cause. 

And afterwards recovery could be so long and painful. It seemed to take forever to quell the intense physical reactions that engulfed her body: the shaking limbs, the hoarse throat, the sickness deep in the belly, the debilitating exhaustion and a desire to just end it all. Shaking off the feelings of unfairness and blame, that cloud her mind and block her rationality. Waiting patiently for the adrenaline to leave, the emotional ambush to dissipate and true feelings of calm to return, so that she could, at last, find clarity. And then the remorse, the guilt, for being so selfish and cruel to the one she loves, being the most vile to the one she wants to hurt the least. 

Then timing the reconcilliation approach - moving too soon and risking restoking the fires and restarting the war. Leaving it too long and inadvertantly sending a message that she doesn't care enough and their relationship isn’t important and can wither. 

And, when they did come together, saying sorry for the right things, remembering to focus on how she had hurt Vanessa and letting go of wanting to punish her for how much she had been hurt.

Finally, taking all the time needed to talk and touch and forgive. And afterwards continuing to walk the tightrope until the hurt feelings are eventually forgotten and normality is restored. 

At least she knew now that this was just a fight and that it didn’t automatically signify the end of their relationship. Except she always harboured doubt that Vanessa wouldn't come back, that she'd realise that she'd had enough and decide that she didn't want her any more. Although, to be fair, she hadn't done that so far and they had dealt with some pretty major disagreements already. 

So she was relatively confident that an ill-timed jibe about Vanessa being suspended, or Frank and Megan, or whatever the hell rubbish it was she came out with this morning, wouldn’t break them. That they were strong and would stay together. 

And she knew that when they did come together again, each would face up to the part they had played in their latest quarrel. Sometimes that happened straight away, sometimes it took longer to unravel the source of the disagreement and reach acceptance. But so far, they had always got there.

She knew that people thought they were an odd pairing. ‘Good’ Vanessa with ‘bad’ Charity. The light and shiny vet with the dark and broody landlady. The saviour and the destroyer. The manipulator and the vulnerable. The player and the played. But their true relationship was nothing like that. They were actually evenly-balanced in power, with neither one being dominant in control. Matched in their willingness to show vulnerability and step up for the other when needed. Trust and truth sat at the heart of their relationship and neither of them took that for granted. 

They had far more in common than could be seen on the surface. Both were fiercely independent and guarded that independence with a passion. They were both used to being on their own, managing their own lives in their own way and neither was in a rush to change that. While they loved being together (most of the time) they also valued time apart, on their own or with other people. It’s why their relationship was moving slowly - they were committed to each other and wanted to see where that would take them, but neither woman wanted to establish a dependency that limited their freedom, shackled them or stopped giving them choice. 

And that, quite often, sat at the heart of their rows. The suspicion that one was getting too needy, was trying to clip the other’s wings or was interfering in the other's life. Then they would push away and launch rockets to re-establish their own space. 

They were both feisty characters who didn’t suffer fools. They could cut people down with a sharp tongue and a cutting word, and did so regularly. Vanessa’s moral stance was maybe more rigid than Charity’s, but they both had clear boundaries and were not shy in letting (each other and) people know when they had been crossed. 

Usually they stood together and fired their sharp and dangerous arrows at other people - those that threatened or upset them. This was proving a strong strategy - they had big and powerful demons to vanquish and they were stronger and more forceful for working in partnership. But the few occasions when they turned those knives inwards towards themselves or each other, then it became potentially deadly and they risked everything.

Then there were the obvious points of similarity - they were both reluctant mothers figuring out how to do the best for their kids, they each ran their own businesses, they had a strong sense of protection over their families and loved ones. And they shared a similar dark sense of humour. Charity smiled to herself as she thought of some of their recent exchanges. And then wrinkled her nose as she thought again of their last one. 

She felt bad. Really bad. Like someone had taken an axe to her and split her down the middle. She felt uncomfortable, disjointed, out of place in her own body. With the boiling liquid of uncertainty thundering in her guts, making the muscles in her thighs tremble and her knees shaky. Her heart beating out of rhythm and her chest tight, her breath difficult. With her brain flying uncontrollably, her thoughts slamming round her head, playing and replaying conversations that may happen, arguing, pleading her case, justifying her actions. Projecting scenarios, good and bad, trying to work out the probability of different outcomes, whether they will make it or not. And she could feel the fear rise. 

It was no good. Usually it took longer than this for Vanessa to calm down, but she had to try. She couldn’t bear feeling like this any more. She rose, and made her way to the back of the pub. 

As she opened the back door, not really paying attention to what she was doing, more focused on the potentially difficult interview ahead, she almost walked straight into the object of her concern standing on the doorstep, about to enter the house. 

“Hey.” 

“Oh, hey.”

They looked at each other. “Babe, I’m really sorry...” Charity started, to be silenced by Vanessa’s finger, on her lips. 

“No, it was me. I over-reacted. It’s just...” she paused, her troubled eyes looking deep into Charity’s. 

“What, Babe?” Charity’s heart fell into her boots. This was it. The one they couldn’t get back from. The end. She couldn’t breathe, felt like the air was being squeezed from her lungs, her bones being crushed by devastation and despair. 

"Charity, I'm sorry, but..."

"Ness, no. Don't do this..." She felt like her world was exploding around her, and she was spinning, falling, falling....

“It’s just, you’re not that funny, Charity. You need to get better jokes.“

Charity started. Her mouth fell open, her eyes wide, lost and speechless. “I...um...I...wha...”

Vanessa gave her a slightly shameful grin, her eyes brimming with apology, and entered the doorway, momentarily resting her hands on Charity's torso and back as she passed her. “Come on, Gobby, I’ll make you a brew, see if that helps you find your voice.“

Charity's tongue clicked behind her top teeth and she tutted, trying to mask her overwhelming sense of relief with false exasperation. She exhaled, delighting in the feeling of clean air moving freely through her lungs. Thankful beyond words that she could breathe again, she turned and followed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you found pleasure in my dribblings


	6. Small, straightforward and beautiful.  Just like you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the trial

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pure soppy indulgence. What can I do? More fluff than the inside of a Henry vacuum cleaner.
> 
> Oh, and a crap pun.

Vanessa wanders outside the pub and hops onto a picnic table, lifting her feet onto the seat. She wraps her arms around her legs and rests her chin on her knees. She breathes out deeply, and breathes in again. She relishes the silence for a while. Just sitting quietly, taking a moment to herself. A quick break from the celebrations inside.

She hears a noise behind her, coming from the doorway. She knows who it is before she sees her or hears her voice. Its Charity. Its always Charity.

"You alright, Babe?" Charity plops herself down next to Vanessa, pressing their sides together, leaning into her. Vanessa turns her head to smile at the other woman. "Yeah. Just taking a moment, you know."

"Mmmm. Its getting a bit much in there. Dingle mania. They like their parties."

"Well there's a lot to celebrate, Charity. You did it. You got him sent down. You got the world to believe you and you got justice. I'm so proud of you."

"Yeah well. I think you did that rather than me, actually."

"Don't be daft. It was you. You're brave. Really brave."

"Hmmm. You make me brave."

Vanessa laughs. "No I don't. It was you, Charity. You're the bravest person I know."

"Mmmm." Charity narrows her eyes, looking at Vanessa. "Well, I couldn't have done this without you, you know. I'd have mucked it all up on my own - I wouldn't even have done it. You held me steady, Babe. You do that, hold me steady."

Vanessa meets her eyes. "Do you feel different? You know, now you've got him?"

Charity looks surprised. "What do you mean? Do you think i'm different?" She wraps her arms around herself protectively.

Vanessa laughs. "No, Charity, don't worry, you're still the sexiest woman on the planet. I mean inside yourself. How you feel about yourself."

"Hmmm. We-ll," she draws the word out, giving herself time to formulate the reply. "I do feel different. Not because he's been sent down, I don't feel good because I've got revenge. I do feel good about that, though. I hope he suffers. But, its more that I've been believed, Vanessa. And maybe it wasn't my fault. Maybe I didn't bring it on myself. Maybe I'm ok, you know?"

"You're far more than OK, Charity Dingle" smiles Vanessa, her eyes shining with love and pride.

"So are you Ness."

Vanessa looks down, suddenly shy. She feels Charity shuffle a little next to her and looks up questioningly, knowing something else is coming but not sure what.

"So, um, I thought, um...."

"What?" Vanessa says quietly, helping her along.

Charity stares deeply into Vanessa's eyes for a moment, searching for something, her own eyes betraying nerves and uncertainty. 

"Marry me, Ness." She says it softly, almost cautiously. "I want us to be together. Properly. You and me, Babe."

Vanessa swallows. "Charity," she says, her voice wobbling. "Have you thought this through? You're reacting to what happened today. Take some time, think about it. Don't ask me unless you really mean it."

Charity smiles and reaches into her pocket, taking out a small box. "There you go again. Always giving me an out. And I thought you might say that. So I got this. I got it a while ago actually but I wanted all this court stuff to be out of the way so that you didn't feel like you had to say yes."

She opens the box. Its a white gold ring with a single solitaire. She smiles. "Small, straightforward and beautiful. Just like you."

Vanessa looks up, her eyes brimming. She holds out her left hand and Charity slips the ring onto it. It fits perfectly. Vanessa tilts her head questioningly. "I may have checked a few things out, when you were sleeping, or out" says Charity, with a cheeky grin. 

Vanessa hrrumphs, in that 'I'm making out like I'm annoyed but really I'm amused by you' kind of way that she does. Then she smiles. A smile that lights up her face, crinkles her eyes and almost splits her mouth. 

"Erm, Babe" Charity hasn't quite finished. "You haven't said yes yet." She still betrays a few nerves about the outcome. 

"Hmmm" says Vanessa, teasingly. leaning forward into Charity. "Yes. Yes. Yes. " She kisses her. "Yes." Kisses her again. "Yes." They are both smiling now. Kissing, smiling, hands snaking their way around each other, into hair, round waists. 

After a while they pull away, their faces reflecting happiness. 

"I love you, Mrs Woodfield," giggles Vanessa.

Charity grimaces. dropping a kiss onto Vanessa's nose. "And I love you, Mrs Dingle."

They get up from the table. Charity takes Vanessa's hand and entwines their fingers together. "Come on then, lets do this and then go home." 

As they enter the pub Charity pulls Vanessa back slightly and breathes into her ear, "and then maybe Bails won't be the only one going down tonight."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments appreciated as per.


	7. Small....and Beautiful Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls return to the pub

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little Dingle daftness, as requested.

They enter the pub, hand in hand. Vanessa looks over to the table at the back, overflowing with Dingles. Raucous doesn't even begin to describe it. Zac is leading a bunch of them in some obscure folk song that they are murdering for all to hear, a loud dispute is occupying a few others. Faith is teasing Cain who is trying his best to bat her away and ignore her. Aaron and Chas are laughing together. She looks round for the Dingle-by-marriage contingent, Moira, Paddy and Robert, who are all sitting, slightly quieter than the rest, with patient and slightly resigned looks on their faces.

She stops and pulls Charity back. "Charity, I can't do this. Let's not tell anyone now, lets keep it to ourselves for a bit." She feels the ring burning on her finger, like it's sounding a beacon out to the whole world to see what they have done, what they are doing. 

"What you on about? Now's the perfect time. Everyone's together, even your Dad's here so he won't kick off. Babe, come on."

"Charity, I.."

"What is it, Babe?" Charity looks concerned now. "Do you not want to..."

"Yes I do, of course I do. More than anything. It's not that. It's just..."

"What? Ness?"

"It's just.... am I going to have to drink out of the welly?"

Charity lets out a loud cackle of laughter. "That you will, Babe. That you will. Dingle tradition, that. And you'll have to do me proud, I can't marry someone who can't take a welly-full."

"Charity, no. I can't. Not in front of everyone."

"Babe, you're going to be a Dingle. You'd better get used to it." She takes pity on her then, leans down and pulls her into a hug. "It's fine, Babe. Don't worry. I'll look after you. I won't let them do anything to you that you don't want."

Vanessa huffs. "I'm perfectly capable of looking after myself, thank you very much. Just, let's not make a big deal of it. Today is your day. If someone notices then we'll say, but let's leave it at that, yeah?"

Charity lifts Vanessa's left hand to her lips and kisses the ring sitting on her third finger. "This is the best bit of today, Babe. But ok, whatever you want. I doubt they'll even notice, I mean, look at them. And they won't make you drink anything, they only bring that out for birthdays and Christmas. Although I'm not even sure you'd be able to pick it up." She cuts her hand, palm down, over the top of Vanessa's head.

"Shut up." Vanessa smiles and pulls her over to the Dingles. A cheer erupts when they arrive, mixed with suggestive "oo-oohs" indicating that their absence has been noticed and inferences made as to where they have been and what they have been doing.

"Been changing a barrel down the cellar then ladies?" says Marlon with suggestively raised eyebrows. "Shut up Marlon," Charity fires back. "What are you doing this side of the bar, anyway?" She gives him a fake glare, followed by a sickly smile. She sits Vanessa down at the table, next to Robert and goes to the bar to get them a drink. 

As Charity is pouring Vanessa a pint, Tracey walks in and goes straight to her. "Charity. Well done. I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks, Babe. I can't quite believe it's all over." She stops, a shiver passing through her as she thinks of the trial and what she had to do. What she had to say. All the horrors she had to re-live in front of an audience. Things that she never thought she would have to bring to light, that she never wanted to think about again.

"Charity, it's ok. It is all over. You don't have to go there ever again. You can put it all behind you now."

Charity smiles at her, knowing that she understands. She's been there and she gets it. She feels close to her then and she has a weird sensation that a part of her wants to thank Bails. This process has brought care and support into her life, from people she would have shunned, before. Now she doesn't. Now she is letting the light in. She is healing.

She shakes herself out of her reverie. "What you having, Babe? It's on me." She pours herself and Tracey some wine and they clink glasses, drinking a toast to the slaying of monsters. They walk together to the party table.

Vanessa is deep in an animated conversation with Robert, her arms flying in all directions to bring emphasis to what she is saying. Suddenly she is silenced, the whole room is silenced, in fact the whole world may have been silenced, by the biggest, loudest, most piercing shriek ever known to man.

"Vanessa. What is that? Is it what I think it is? Oh my God it is. IT IS." It's Tracey. Obviously.

Vanessa turns bright red and drops her hands into her lap, covering the ring over. Then she catches Charity's eye and smiles. "Actually Tracey, yes it is what you think it is." She lifts her arm and points it at Tracey, her wrist bent regally, to show off the glittering diamond sparkling on her third finger.

Chaos erupts. People jump to their feet, Charity and Vanessa are pulled into hugs, more drinks appear, Frank is cajolled into joining them, the party rages on.

Finally the melee dies down and some vague semblance of order returns. Zac seizes his moment. He taps his glass until he gets something approaching silence, then he rises to his feet.

"Well. It falls to me, as the head of this family, to congratulate the pair of you. Vanessa, Charity, we are happy for you both. I have a few words of Dingle wisdom for you, which I will now share. Charity, be good and behave yourself. Vanessa, good luck, love."

"Uncle Zac..." protests Charity, indignantly, but he raises his hand to silence her.

"Now, there is only one thing left to make this day complete and welcome Vanessa properly into the family. Sam, fetch the welly...."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments welcomed as always


	8. Small....and Beautiful Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after Vanity decide to tie the knot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluffier than Fluffy the fluffy cat sitting fluffily in her fluffy bed playing with her fluffy toy.

Consciousness seeped slowly into Vanessa’s brain. She had the following realisations in the following order: 1. Her head hurt. 2. Her back was a little sore. 3. She was in bed with Charity Dingle (this was confirmed by the arm draped loosely over her hip). 4. She had absolutely no recollection of the night before. 

She groaned and felt the body pressed into her back, stir. A tiny kiss was planted behind her ear and the sweetest voice in the world said softly, “you’re alive then.”

“I don’t think so,” she replied. “My mouth feels like something’s crawled into it and died. And I have a million bees buzzing round in my head. And I don’t think I can open my eyes.”

Charity reached over her to the bedside table. “Here.” She put a glass into Vanessa’s hand, holding it steady as Vanessa lifted her head and brought the glass up to her lips. When she’d drained it dry of water Charity returned it to the bedside table and sank back down to snuggle into her girlfriend’s back. 

Oh, hang on. A memory pinged into Vanessa’s head and she lifted her hand and forced her eyes open. Yes! There was a ring on it. “Charity, we’re engaged,” she said, before she could stop herself. And be cool.

She felt another soft kiss land on her shoulder as Charity replied. “Yes we are, Babe, yes we are.”

“And you won the court case.”

“Yep.”

Another ping brought a slightly less welcome memory to her. “Oh God, Charity. The welly!”

“Yes, Vanessa. The welly.”

“Oh, Charity. The table.”

“Yes Vanessa, the table.” 

“Why was I....”

“Well, I wasn’t the only one questioning if you were tall enough to lift the welly. So you made Sam fill it and you climbed onto the table to drink it. You had the whole pub clapping and chanting while you knocked the whole damn thing back. And then you fell off the table."

“What?”

“Yeah. You tipped your head so far back to get the dregs that you overbalanced and toppled right off. I swear it was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen.” Charity chuckled at the memory. 

“No! What happened?”

“Well thankfully your fiancée has amazing foresight, saw the whole thing coming and was standing behind you to catch you. No need to thank me, Babe.” She planted a row of kisses from Vanessa's shoulder to her neck.

“Mmmm. My fiancée.” Vanessa chose to focus on that part of the story, to stave off the oncoming feelings of mortifying embarrassment. She shuffled round so that she was facing Charity and brought their lips together. But not for long. 

“Eew, Babe, you taste disgusting.” Charity pulled away, with a smile on her face. “And then it all went downhill from there,” she continued. 

“You love me, right?” Vanessa stopped her before she could say any more. 

“You know I do. Why?”

“Because I think we’re going to have to leave the village.” Her voice was small and muffled as her face was pressed into Charity’s armpit. 

“Mmmm. Maybe. Everyone will forgive you though, if you give it long enough.”

“Charity, what did I do?” She braced herself, not quite knowing what was going to come next. 

“Well, first you had to kiss every Dingle, and I mean every Dingle, or Dingle-Dangle as you were calling them, because they’re your family now. And then you insisted on apologising to everyone in the pub, individually, and in great detail, because they couldn’t marry me and so they could never be as happy as you. And then you told them all sorts of private things about us.”

“Noooo. Like what?”

“Like how we when we’re together we can’t fall asleep without at least some part of us touching. And how when I put Johnny down, just after I turn the light off, I count to him the ways in which I love his mother, to send him to sleep, which apparently I think you don’t know about. And how when we don’t spend the night together I phone you first thing to sing you my special Good Morning Vanessa song. Which you sang to the whole pub. Loudly. And slightly out of tune. And all sorts of other things which no one is ever supposed to know about me. “

Vanessa pressed harder into Charity's armpit and squeaked, "Charity, I’m so sorry. Are you mad at me?”

Charity kissed the top of Vanessa’s head lightly. “Yes, Vanessa. I’m furious.”

She probably should have been cross with Vanessa for some of the things she had come out with the previous night. But truth be told she was secretly made up with how Vanessa had behaved. No one in her life had ever been so genuinely happy just to be with her. So happy that they needed to shout about it. With most of her previous partners, the words they spoke when in their cups were of judgement and shame: harsh judgement of her and her past, and shame of themselves for being with her. Recriminations would follow soon afterwards. And that never ended well. 

So to have beautiful, smart, funny, feisty, amazing Vanessa showing off because she has won the Charity Dingle prize (as she had slurred to anyone that would care to listen, and many that didn’t, the night before) gave Charity feelings of love and acceptance and completeness and joy beyond anything she’d ever dreamed of. Not that she’d ever tell Vanessa that. But she’d damn well show her, for as long as Vanessa let her.

Vanessa lifted her head to look into Charity’s eyes, to check she was joking. When she was satisfied she reached down and lifted Charity’s left hand to her face and studied it. “Hmmm. Well I do not want to show my face in the village today so I think we should skive off and go into town. We have some shopping to do.”

“Oh, Ness, there’s no need.”

“Charity, there’s every need,” replied Vanessa sternly. “You’re my fiancée and everyone needs to know that.”

“Oh I think they all know, Babe.”

“Shut up. Anyway, it’s not like you to turn down the chance to play truant to go on a shopping trip.”

“Oh I’m not turning you down, Ness. There’s just something we need to do first to celebrate our engagement.”

“Eh? What’s that?”

“Well, go clean your teeth, come back to bed and I’ll show you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Likee? Please tellee.


	9. Morning, Meddler

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls review their week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just love to think of them waking up on a Saturday morning and having a chat.
> 
> short and sweet.

Charity wakes with a smile, and squeezes her arms, wrapped tightly around Vanessa. She reaches her head forwards slightly to smooth a gentle kiss along the back of her neck. She hears a familiar sound - half-yawn, half-groan - as awareness invades Vanessa's body. 

“Morning, Meddler,” Charity whispers into her ear. Vanessa groans again. "Ugh. Charity. Hullo."

"I'm never going to stop you, am I?"

"Have I ever tried to change anything about you, Charity?"

"Ummmm, nope."

"Well then." Vanessa reverses her body further into Charity's torso. "Shut up and cuddle me."

Charity obliges, pulling her closer and dropping a kiss onto her cheek. They lie there in silence for a while, just enjoying the togetherness.

"How did you get on with Ryan yesterday?" Charity had come to bed late after closing the pub last night and they hadn't had a chance to talk.

"Yeah, good. It feels good now, with Irene on board and everything. And him knowing the situation here, makes it all better, you know. Out in the open. Not hiding anything."

"Hmm. Funny that."

"Yeah well," says Charity, tapping Vanessa lightly on the shoulder. "He asked me about you, you know."

"Yeah?" Vanessa shuffles round to face her girlfriend. "What did he want to know? How you landed someone like me?"

Charity chuckles. "Yeah, something like that. He likes you, Ness. He was asking how we got together and stuff."

"Well I like him too. But then, he's the spit of you, so why wouldn't I?"

"He said despite all he's heard about me from everyone else. Mainly Ross actually, probably. And God knows what he's told him," she rolls her eyes. " Anyway, he said..." she stops.

"What Charity?" Vanessa lifts her nose from under Charity's ear to look her in the eyes. "What?" she says again, curiously.

"He said.....I can't be all bad if someone like you loves me that much."

Vanessa's face burns. Suddenly she can't breathe. She backs away from Charity, slowly, rolls onto her back and lays her arm over her face, hiding her eyes. 

"I, what, I, um, oh."

"Is he right? Do you?" If Vanessa was paying attention she would hear Charity smiling as she speaks, but she doesn't. She's too busy panicking. Charity's arm moves and she feels light fingers tickling the base of her throat.

Vanessa doesn't know where to go with this so she stays still, saying nothing.

"Ness?" Charity pleads.

Vanessa moves her arm off her face and turns her head towards Charity. "Do you really need to ask?"

"Maybe I don't, but I really need to hear the answer."

Vanessa pauses for a moment, biting her lip. Then she makes a decision. What the hell. She turns her body towards her, cups Charity's cheek in her hand and sighs. "Yes Charity, I do. I love you. More than anyone, anything, ever. I've never felt anything this...this strong before. It's massive. I've loved you since...since...well sin..." She stops, unable to say any more as her mouth is full of Charity. 

The kiss is softer, more loving, more beautiful than anything she has ever felt. They cling together, holding on, breathing life into each other.

Charity breaks away and looks deep into Vanessa's eyes. "Good job I love you too then, isn't it." Vanessa closes her eyes and finally, finally, her body relaxes. Charity holds her tighter and their mouths meet again.

"Did he give you any tips on how to hang onto me?" Vanessa chuckles wickedly after a while. "Cos he thinks you're going to have to try."

"Cheeky git. Punching above my weight! Cheeky git."

Vanessa laughs. "Your cheeky git."

Charity smiles. A more loving, content, happy, authentic smile Vanessa has never seen, especially on that particular beautiful face. "Yeah," she nods. "My cheeky git."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know what to do.


	10. Lunchtime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charity and Vanessa spend some stolen time together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just cuz I can.

"Come 'ere," Charity leans towards Vanessa and pulls her close, bending her head to the side and kissing her lips. Vanessa responds in kind and they stay that way for some time, just enjoying the taste, feel and touch of each other.

Eventually they break away, smiling, eyes locked into each other. "Hey," Vanessa says softly in Charity's face.

"Hey," Charity responds. "I've missed you."

Vanessa chuckles. "Charity, you saw me this morning."

"Yeah, well a morning can be a long time, Ness."

Vanessa lifts her hand and cups the side of Charity's face, stroking just below her eye with her thumb. "Well now you're here, would you like a brew?"

"Nah. Just more of this, please." Their lips meet again and they stop talking, for a while.

"Mmmm. Shall we just stay here forever, doing this?" Something has changed in Charity, any natural hardness seems to have vanished completely around Vanessa and she is soft and cuddly and romantic practically all of the time when they are alone.

"Yes." Vanessa wants more so moves her hand to the back of Charity's head and pulls her in again.

Charity is leaning over Vanessa now, who is pressed back against the sofa. They are both relaxed, happy, delighting in each other's company, revelling in their stolen time together.

"What are you doing later?" Vanessa asks as they pause for breath.

"This. Here. With you." 

"Oh. I'll have to get rid of Tracey then."

"Don't care, Babe. She can sit over there." Charity smiles and flicks her head towards the kitchen, her eyes sparkling. She captures Vanessa's mouth once more.

They don't talk for a bit as their talking gear is otherwise engaged. 

"Mmmm. You’re the best kisser, Ness." Charity doesn't stop what she's doing for compliments.

"I am, yes." They continue.

Some time later Vanessa feels a poke in her side as Charity softly clears her throat. Her lips curl up into a smile but she says nothing and keeps doing what she's the best at.

"Ahem," Charity makes a louder noise, slapping Vanessa's arm.

"Hmmmm," Vanessa hums into Charity's mouth.

"Ness," Charity slaps her again and pulls away from Vanessa, the mischief in her eyes belying the exasperated look on her face. 

Vanessa grins knowingly at her. "Oh no, Charity, you are the best kisser. Much better than me." She can't keep the sarcastic note out of her voice.

"Thank you," Charity moves forwards again.

Time passes, although it feels like it’s standing still .

“Charity.”

“Shhh. Busy, Babe."

"Charity."

"Ness, its rude to talk with your mouth full.“

“Charity," Vanessa pushes Charity's shoulders to put some space between them. 

"What?" Charity tries to lunge forward but Vanessa holds her back, gazing deep into her eyes.

"You know that thing we don’t say to each other?"

"Eh?" 

"Well, that.” Vanessa holds her gaze for a moment until she's sure that Charity gets her meaning, then releases her grip and they fall into each other again. 

Minutes later Charity smiles into Vanessa's mouth. “Babe, that thing? Me too. A lot.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ta for the eye work.


	11. Right, Well, I'll see you in a bit, then.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charity goes round to see Vanessa after she gets back from Lanzarote but things don't go quite as Vanessa planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I think my favourite Vanity scene of all is the one where Vanessa tells Charity off in the pub for going off on holiday without saying goodbye and not sending her a postcard, but is totally incapable of saying no to her coming round later. So I wrote about what happened when Charity got there.
> 
> Its a little bit smutty and a tiny tiny bit sweary but who cares, right?

Charity rocked up about 8 o'clock, after her shift had finished. Vanessa had butterflies - she had no idea where the two of them stood right now. Less than 2 weeks after they didn't (!) get together but confessed their feelings Charity had pissed off on holiday without so much as a by your leave. She was getting tired of this dance they were playing around their feelings, she'd had enough half-arsed relationships in her time to be bothered with another one. But there was something about Charity that she just couldn't refuse. 

That didn't mean she was going to make it easy for her though. Even though Charity was a queen of seduction, and Vanessa was pretty incapable of resisting her when she came on strong (and she knew how to come on strong), tonight she determined to hold her nerve and let Charity squirm. A little. Enough. Then she'd give in. And take her wildly. Maybe up against the wall. Or on the floor. Or over the kitchen table. Fast and hot and sexy. Cos she can. And she wanted her. Like, more than she'd wanted anyone. Ever. 

She'd been pacing the floor since 7. Fidgeting, fluffing cushions, tidying stuff that was already tidy. Wiping the kitchen sides, again. Running upstairs to check her outfit (and change her underwear, twice. For a sexier set!). Every so often she'd sit down, to calm herself, so that she would appear cool when Charity finally arrived. But that was no use - she had never felt less cool. She managed to sit like that for about 20 seconds then got up and started fannying around again.

So by the time Charity actually arrived, she was in a bit of a state. Vanessa heard the knock at the door and wiped her palms down her jeans (it wasn't her new pair - she didn't want to look like she was trying too hard) to steady herself. She tried breathing, but that didn't really work. She shook herself and gave herself a final silent pep-talk ("Come on now V, its only Charity, she's just another person. Be cool, let her in and talk for a while. Let her explain herself and make sure you're happy with her excuses before you let her touch you. Chill out. You're in the driving seat here, she needs to do the grovelling, don't let her forget that. And whatever you do, don't let her seduce you until you're satisfied that she's sorry).

Charity knocked at the door again (Vanessa's little pep-talk had taken longer than she thought). Taking a final deep breath, Vanessa walked into the hallway and opened the door. And there stood Charity. Looking stunningly, breathtakingly, super-humanly gorgeous (in actual fact she was just wearing jeans, that crazy jumper and her winter coat, and hadn't even fixed her hair, but Vanessa's brain had gone a bit doo-lah by then).

Vanessa's hands flew out to grab Charity by the lapels and yank her inside. As Charity stumbled through the door, Vanessa pulled her closer and their mouths met in a fierce, hot, desperate kiss. She dragged her into the living room and they tumbled onto the sofa. Vanessa ran her hands over Charity's shoulders and down her back to relieve her of her coat. They were kissing hungrily, tongues lashing together, hands all over each other's bodies, tugging at clothes to find the hot skin underneath.

"Fuck, I've missed you," Charity managed to squeeze out breathily through Vanessa's onslaught. 

"Shut up," replied Vanessa, her words reverberating down Charity's throat. "This doesn't mean you're forgiven."

"Uh. Can't wait for the make-up shag then." Charity's laugh was dirty in Vanessa's mouth. But it just turned them on all the more.

They rolled off the sofa onto the floor. Vanessa rolled them again so that she was on top of Charity. She turned her attention to Charity's neck, kissing, licking, sucking, finding all the sensitive spots that she was now so familiar with, while her hands fumbled with the button on Charity's jeans. As soon as she released it her hand snaked its way into Charity's knickers. She flexed her knees, pushing Charity's legs further apart and lay her hand on Charity's core.

Charity moaned, her breathing fast and hot. Her hands were down the back of Vanessa's jeans, squeezing her bottom, pulling her hips in close.

Vanessa raised her head so that she could look Charity in the eyes as she slid two fingers inside her. The look she saw reflected in those green pools staring back at her, coupled with the sweet wetness encompassing her fingers nearly made her climax on the spot. Charity, sensing Vanessa's arousal, slipped one hand off her bottom and moved it frontwards to Vanessa's heat, where she started massaging her gently. Vanessa lost complete concentration for a moment, as her body tensed and her head flicked backwards, focused only on the sensations now assaulting her body. 

Charity continued, teasing Vanessa's opening and slipping a finger inside her. In response Vanessa's own hand started moving in time with her rising orgasm. As Charity brought her closer and closer her own fingers moved faster and faster inside Charity, and finally, when she could hold back no longer, with a cry she came. Her climax tipped Charity into her own release, cursing loudly and thrusting wildly around Vanessa's fingers.

Vanessa collapsed onto Charity, who pulled her hands out of Vanessa's jeans to wrap them around her body. Vanessa raised her hands to cup Charity's face and kissed her deeply. "That wasn't quite the welcome home I was planning," she said with a hint of irritation in her voice.

"Well, you're not giving me much incentive to say goodbye next time I go away, Babe," replied Charity, with a glint in her eye and a cheeky smile.

Vanessa rolled off Charity then, and exhaled. Charity looked at her with an unfathomable expression but said nothing. Vanessa found Charity's hand with hers and twined their fingers together.

"So, you want to continue then?" She asked.

"Yeah, I do. I meant it, Babe, I've missed you." Charity was in a rare, candid mood and spoke with sincerity. "I'm guessing by this that you've missed me too."

"Still with no strings though, yeah?"

"Yeah," Charity replied, with more than a hint of uncertainty in her voice. Vanessa heard it, clearly, but chose to do nothing. For now.

"Right," Vanessa said, sitting up and doing up her jeans. "Do you want a glass of wine and to tell me all about your holiday?"

"Ok, if you like. And after that?" Charity was pushing a little, but not so much as to make Vanessa bite. She clearly wanted to stay on Vanessa's good side.

"Well, are you planning on staying the night?"

Charity flashed Vanessa her special 'I've got what I wanted' smile. 

"I may have brought my toothbrush."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, I did my thang, do yours :-)


	12. Day 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charity looks after Vanessa when she's not feeling at her best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had terrible hormone rage for the last couple of days so I thought I'd share it with the girls. In doing so my own rage has gone and I've laughed a lot while writing this. Its supposed to be lighthearted.
> 
> And I'd like to apologise on behalf of Vanessa for the language she uses in this story. She was having a bad day and was out of sorts.

Charity liked waking up in Vanessa's bed. It was a more peaceful awakening than at the pub. Fewer people coming and going at all hours, making unwelcome noises, talking loudly outside her room and slamming the bathroom door. 

Vanessa's bed was firm with soft feather pillows and a generous duvet, so she generally slept well and the feeling in her body upon wakening was always luxurious. The light entered the bedroom at a particular angle, so sunlight shards hit the bed softly, warming her face and glittering orange through her eyelids to tease them open. 

And of course there was Vanessa, lying next to her, smiling her good morning with a welcome kiss and a gentle caress, or still sleeping, beautiful in repose. Charity could spend long minutes then, just staring, drinking in Vanessa's loveliness, without fear of embarrassment or reproach. 

So Charity liked waking up in Vanessa's bed. Usually. But not today. Today she awoke with a jolt as her body twisted, the duvet rapidly disappearing over the other side of the bed. 

"For fuck's sake, Charity. I'm freezing. You've got all the duvet. AGAIN."

"Morning," Charity responded, a bit bemused. "You ok, Ness?"

"Yes, I'm fine," came the tart response. "Considering."

"Considering what, Babe?"

"Considering I haven't slept a wink because you've been tossing and turning all night. Again. And stealing the duvet. Like normal. And you've been snoring like a bastard. I wish you'd stop drinking so much. It fucks with your sinuses and its a fucking nightmare. For everyone. Especially me."

"Babe, I didn't have anything to drink las...ugh, what's the point? Tea?" Charity realised with dismay what was going on so she rolled out of bed and left the room. As she went down the stairs she heard Vanessa shouting after her, "and don't put too much milk in it, like you always do."

Tracey was already up and dressed in the kitchen. She greeted Charity with a grimace. "Oh God," she said. "Is it...?"

"Yep," Charity interrupted her. "Day 19. And it sounds like its gunna be a bad one."

"Oh, well, I'm out of here," Tracey was preparing for a quick exit. "I'm supposed to pick Johnny up tonight. I don't suppose..."

"Yeah," Charity sighed. "I'll do it. I'll pop into town this afternoon and pick up some supplies and I'll look after her tonight. I'd make yourself scarce if I was you."

"Oh I will. I'll stay with Dad. Actually why don't I take Johnny? He shouldn't have to put up with her like that."

"How about I pick him up and I'll drop him over to you?" 20 minutes with her Johnny (as she secretly liked to call him) was likely to be the highlight of her day and she was reluctant to give it up.

"Plan. Oh, and we'd better let Rhona know. Shall I do it or will you?"

"I'll text her," said Charity. "I'll see how long she can put up with her. No doubt they'll want Vanessa out of there as soon as possible. Particularly if they have customers. They won't want her around anyone today."

"Well, good luck, Charity. You're going to need it." Tracey left the house, shutting the door quietly behind her.

Charity smiled and made tea, sighing to herself as she mounted the stairs. She lifted her chin in defiance as she entered the bedroom and couldn't help but smile at the grumpy face staring up at her. "Took your time."

Charity handed Vanessa her tea. "Babe, I'm going to shoot off now. I've got some stuff to sort out at the pub then I'm going into town this afternoon. Is there anything you need? I'll pick up some bits for us then I'll get Johnny and see you back here tonight, yeah? I'll cook dinner." She started pulling her clothes together so that she could get dressed, trying to be unobtrusive but speedy.

"Aaaaawwww," came back a whine. "Aren't you going to stay with me while I drink my tea?"

"I'd love to, Babe, but I've really got to..." she waved her hand vaguely in the direction of the pub. As soon as she had sufficient clothes on she leaned down and kissed Vanessa briefly on the lips. "Love you, Babe. See you later, have a good day." She got out of there as fast as she could, ignoring Vanessa's pout and fluttering eyelashes.

Just before leaving she called up the stairs. "Babe. Can you check your calendar? Thanks, see you later." She left without waiting for a response.

As she crossed the road to the pub she texted Rhona.

'Morning. Day 19 alert. Its a bad one. I'm picking Johnny up at 3, send her home anytime after that and I'll do the rest. Good luck x'

Moments later she got a response.

'Arse biscuits! Thanks for the heads up. I'll do what I can, but if she scares the animals or Paddy I'll have to let her go. Good luck to you. x'

She snuck into the pub and made herself a cup of tea. She sat at the table quietly, enjoying the search for some inner calm. Before long she was joined by Chas.

"Oh, hey. You're back early."

"Yeah. Its Day 19. Had to get out of there."

"Oh no. Poor Vanessa."

"Poor Vanessa? Poor rest of the world, more like."

"Charity, raging hormones are hard to deal with."

"Yes they are. For all of us. At least she's monitoring her cycle now, so that we know its coming. Not that she realises, though. She has no idea how we all tiptoe around her when she's like this."

"Oh give over. You love it. Her scolding you like she does turns you on. And she feels terrible afterwards which means she dotes on you for days. Anyway, it could be worse. At least she gets all of hers out of the way in one day. Debbie's a monster for a week. So are you, come to think of it."

"Hmmm," Charity looked at her with narrowed eyes and a put-upon expression. "Anyway, its my afternoon off so I'm going to pop into Hotten to pick up some bubble bath and massage oil and a few other bits to help her along. Some chocolate." She got up. "But I'll get us ready to open up this morning."

Chas looked after her departing figure with a grin. "Love suits you, Charity," she called after her. She laughed when all she heard was the "...off" part of Charity's retort.

\------------------------------------------------------

It was about 4 o'clock when she heard the door go and Vanessa arrive home. She didn't really want to ask about her day, or need to, in fact, as she'd been phoned 3 times already to be told in no uncertain terms how useless everyone in the veterinary world was. And once to listen to a catalogue of everything she'd ever done wrong in their relationship. Plus she'd been fending off regular texts from Rhona asking if she could send Vanessa home early because she was upsetting the customers. And turning the milk sour.

"Hi, Babe," she called. "I'm making dinner, Spaghetti Carbonara. Thought you might fancy it tonight. I've run you a bath and there's a glass of red here for you. I know it's early but hey, one won't kill you."

She heard Vanessa flop down onto the sofa with a heavy sigh. "Well?" She said, snappishly. "Aren't you going to ask me about my day?"

"I've heard quite a bit about it already but, ok, how was your day, Vanessa?" the last bit said in an exaggerated monotone.

"It was shit. I just don't get how backward they all are. And stupid. And difficult. Honestly, they're such a bunch of c..."

"Alright Vanessa," Charity walked over to the sofa and pulled her up, handing her a glass of wine. "Enough. Go and get in the bath. I've put your fluffy pyjamas out on the bed so get into them and come down when you're ready and we'll eat. No hurry. Take as long as you need."

Vanessa huffed and walked upstairs. As she reached the landing Charity called out "Babe, did you look in your calendar?" She heard Vanessa grumble as she stopped and pulled her phone out of her back pocket. 

"Shit!"

Charity smiled.

"Shit. Charity?"

"Yes Babe?" she called up the stairs, innocently.

"Oh God, its...I'm sorry"

"Its fine, Babe. Get in the bath. We can talk when you get down here." 

Charity busied herself cooking comfort food for her girlfriend. She lost herself in it for a while, enjoying the solitude and the peace and, well, just making something. She jumped when she felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist and a head rest on her back.

"Charity, I'm so sorry. Have I been truly awful?"

"Truly."

"I'm sorry. God, I don't think I've been much better at work."

Charity laughed. "You think? I've had to talk Rhona down from the tranquiliser cupboard at least twice. For you, not her," she added, quickly.

"Oh no. Why didn't you warn me?"

"I tried, Babe. Believe me, I tried." She turned round and kissed Vanessa softly on the lips. "I wish you'd look at your calendar more though, as soon as you know what day it is it gets easier. For everyone."

"I'm sorry. It feels so real. Until I know what's going on. Then I can deal a bit better."

"I know, Babe. Still, no real harm done, this month. Now, we can eat, or I can give you a rub. Tummy and feet are already on the list, is there anywhere else you want these babies on you tonight?" She waved jazz hands at Vanessa.

Vanessa looked at her suspiciously. "Who are you and what have you done with my girlfriend?" 

Charity laughed. "I'm trying a new approach, Ness. If I want you to be nice to me, I have to be nice to you. Or so you tell me. Anyway, its no fun arguing back with you when you're like this. You cry and get all sorry for yourself far too quickly. Its pathetic."

"But I said some awful things, Charity."

Oh, I've heard far worse..."

"...from people you care about a lot more than me," Vanessa finished the line for her with a grin. 

"Hmmm. Except, there isn't really anyone I care about more than you."

"Oh. Now I know you're an imposter," Vanessa hit her lightly on the arm and followed it up with a peck on the lips. "Come on," she dragged Charity over to the sofa. "Are you not drinking?" She noticed Charity's lack of glass.

"Naaah. thought I'd give it a miss tonight. It messes with my sinuses. Apparently."

"Shut up. I'll get you one," Vanessa rose and went to the kitchen. She leaned over the stove to see what was cooking and smiled when she realised her girlfriend had opted to feed her carbohydrates and cream, always a hormone-soother. Picking up a fresh glass and the bottle of wine she returned to the sofa, leaning down and giving Charity a lingering kiss. 

"Oh. Have I got my Vanessa back now?" Charity asked when they finally broke apart and Vanessa plopped down on the sofa next to her.

"Yes. You have. And your Vanessa loves you."

"Good job, isn't it," replied Charity, leaning in for another kiss.

\------------------------------------------------

The next morning when the shards of orange sunlight woke her there was Vanessa, lying next to her, smiling her good morning with a welcome kiss and a gentle caress. Charity sighed, contented. She liked waking up in Vanessa's bed. With her Vanessa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope I haven't offended anyone by talking about this in a lighthearted way. Its still a bit of a taboo subject and my view is that until we start talking about it openly we can't demystify it and just accept it as part of the wonderful ways of women. Which it is.


	13. The Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charity plays a game of seduction with Vanessa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little bank holiday nonsense.

Charity was playing a game. With Vanessa, although Vanessa didn't know it. A game of seduction. On the surface, that wasn't much of a game. They were still pretty mad about each other and the rampancy of their desire hadn't waned in the months they had been together, so getting Vanessa into bed was never that difficult. To be honest, she only need ask, or just grab her, and Vanessa would put out pretty much immediately. She always did her best to give Charity what she wanted, so if she realised that Charity wanted sex, she'd most likely give it to her in a moment.

But Charity didn't want that today. She didn't want it to be easy. She wanted to work for it. She didn't want to be the instigator. She wanted Vanessa to demand it, to be so hot for her that she couldn't help herself. That was the game. To get Vanessa to take her upstairs in the middle of the day, a working day, without realising she'd been played. And therein lay the challenge. Vanessa knew a lot of her moves now, and could read her like a book, so she had to be super subtle and not give her intentions away. If Vanessa got even a hint of what Charity wanted, the game would be over. And she didn't intend to lose.

She smiled as she gave herself one more rule - she wasn't going to use talking as a tool in her seduction. She wasn't going to ignore her, but flirting with Vanessa to get her going was way too easy for today's challenge. It had to be done without words.

She was behind the bar. Vanessa had dropped in for a coffee and to catch up with her girlfriend. She'd snuck out of work while no one was looking so she didn't have long. That brought extra frisson to the game - she had little time to get Vanessa to bite otherwise it would be a big fail. The way she'd set it up she could lose the game, drag Vanessa upstairs herself if necessary, and still get the outcome she desperately wanted. That would count as a result. But if she couldn't manage to get Vanessa into bed at all in the next 10 minutes or so, she would start to think she was losing her touch.

The bar was pretty busy, so she wasn't able to spend a lot of time with Vanessa - usually they'd hang out over the bar and chat. But she didn't want that today - fortunately there were plenty of people requiring her attention so she was constantly moving and interacting. Which worked in her favour. She knew that Vanessa loved watching her work and she intended to use this to the full.

Her first weapon was her hands. Vanessa was captivated by Charity's hands. To be fair, Charity was very, very good with her hands and she wanted to remind Vanessa of that, to get her thinking about her hands on Vanessa's body and what she did with them when they were there.

She set about drawing Vanessa's attention where she wanted it. She started waving her arms a little bit more than normal when talking to the punters, slightly over-exaggerating her hand movements. Not a lot, but enough for Vanessa (whose attention was never far away from Charity whenever they were in the same room) to clock them. She made sure she flexed her fingers, stretching her long digits out whenever she could, slightly curling them as she drew them back into her palm. 

She went to pull a pint. Wrapping her right hand tightly around the glass, she used just the first two fingers of her left hand to depress the tap and she lightly pulsed them on the top of the tap while the beer flowed. She sneaked a glance at the object of her desire. Vanessa seemed riveted on her hand atop the pump, breathing through her slightly open mouth. She continued pulsing her fingers, circling them lightly around on the plastic tap. She noted a minute shortening of Vanessa's breath, hardly noticeable unless you were specifically searching out the signs, as Charity was. When the glass was full she softly lifted the tap to close it off. She gave it a final stroke, rested her fingers on it for a second, then picked up the pint and handed it to the punter. 

After she handed him his change and he turned away, she put her hands on the small of her back and pressed, stretching her back out. She could feel Vanessa's eyes burning into her shoulders as she drew her hands down, smoothing out her jeans over her bottom. Just naturally, not at all suggestive, just lengthening a little before relaxing. A tiny noise fell from her lips, a seemingly involuntary appreciation of the feel of her own hands on her body. 

Her back view was undoubtedly her best asset in this game - Vanessa constantly complimented her on the shape and poise of her back. And she was a total bottom woman - she had noticed that Vanessa quite often found an excuse to drop back when they were walking together so that she could cop a sneaky look at Charity's bum. She thought Charity didn't know this but Charity's ever-growing infatuation with Vanessa and her consequent need to study in detail everything about her made her super-attentive to Vanessa's quirks. She momentarily distracted herself, remembering the tiny bruises she carried when Vanessa's over-worship of that particular part of her resulted in her sinking her teeth in just a little harder than intended. 

Turning back to face Vanessa she could tell that her plan was working. Vanessa's eyes were darkening, a tiny widening of the pupils. Focusing in on her neck she could see that her pulse rate was slightly raised, and her chest was starting to heave - not obviously but clearly there if you knew what to look for. And she had the the faintest rising of colour in her cheeks.

She walked over to where Vanessa sat nursing her coffee. And smiled. A wide, open smile, innocent and full of love. Despite her mischievous intent, it was genuine. She didn't ever have to fake looking at Vanessa like she loved her. She may not have said it in words, but it was written all over her. Vanessa smiled back then looked down into her cup, suddenly shy at the intensity of the gaze levelled at her. Damn. She'd broken the connection. That wasn't the plan. Charity leaned over the bar towards Vanessa, catching her attention again. If her shirt happened to be gaping a bit more than it needed to be, accidentally giving her girlfriend a private view down her top, then that couldn't harm, could it?

She leaned further forwards, about to whisper something conspiritorial to Vanessa, then a punter over the other side of the bar caught her eye. "Just gotta..." she straightened up, waved her hand in his direction and walked away to serve the customer. She heard Vanessa sigh impatiently. Good. She was back in the game.

This time when she was passing the time of day with the customer she absent-mindedly ran her fingers through her hair, casually massaging her scalp then twirling the ends as she drew her hands out, like Vanessa did, as she laughed at what was being said to her. She lifted her hands to the back of her neck and fanned her hair out behind her, just to straighten it and smarten it up, of course.

She turned back to her girlfriend, licking and sucking in her lips as she moved slowly towards her. She could see Vanessa looking at her with barely disguised lust. Ok. Phase 1, tick. She had got Vanessa's juices going. Now she had to get her to act on it. This was the tricky bit and she may need to relax the rules a little.

She leaned over the bar towards Vanessa but suddenly pulled herself up again. She jerked her thumb towards the back room. "Babe, I've just got to..." She wandered out of the bar into the living quarters. She walked over to the table and started sorting through some random papers, lifting her head and smiling to herself when she heard the door gently being closed behind her.

"Charity." She turned to see Vanessa leaning against the door. "Come here," Vanessa's voice was deep in her throat. Charity turned back to the table, taking her time to replace the papers, then turned again and walked slowly towards Vanessa, maintaining eye contact the whole way. Keeping her eyes wide and innocent, praying that they wouldn't betray her and give away the urgent wanting, deep in her belly. She walked right up to Vanessa and pressed their bodies together, pushing Vanessa into the door. She tilted her head and moved her open mouth towards Vanessa's lips. 

"I have to get back to the bar," she whispered into Vanessa's mouth and straightened up, as if to move away. Vanessa grabbed her then.

"You're going nowhere," Vanessa tugged her in and kissed her, hard and deep. Summoning up every ounce of self-restraint she had ever had, Charity responded minimally to the kiss and pulled back at the first opportunity. 

"I really do have to get back, I'm on shift." She advanced on Vanessa again, reaching past her to grasp the door handle.

"You're not going back to the bar, Charity," Vanessa growled as Charity turned the door handle and made to pull the door open. Vanessa's hand closed over hers on the door knob and she pulled it away, leading her over to the door that led to the stairs. She opened it and pulled Charity through.

"Upstairs, now." Her voice was strong and commanding, coming from deep within her core. Charity legs weakened at the intensity of Vanessa's need, and offered no resistance as she was pulled by the hand up the stairs. She let herself be dragged into the bedroom and watched as Vanessa started undressing, smiling softly to herself. She awarded herself a mental medal for her victory, chuffed that she'd still got what it takes, and moved towards Vanessa to collect her prize.


	14. Come to me, yeah?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following the big reveal of Ryan to his siblings

She was on top of Vanessa. Inside her. Riding her hard. Tonight she was hot and desperate, an uncharacteristic lack of affection in her lovemaking. 

She hadn't kissed Vanessa on the mouth, keeping her lips pressed instead to her neck and throat. It was verging on the impersonal, almost as if Vanessa herself was surplus to requirements, except that she kept breathing her name into her skin. "Vanessa. Ness." Like a mantra. Over and over. Like it was the only thing that tethered her to the world, the only thing that could save her.

Often when she was needy she feigned nonchalance, making out that it was Vanessa who demanded the contact and then she would graciously acquiesce. But tonight there had been none of that. No games. She had nothing left to play with and nowhere else to hide and so she had just asked. Straight up. "Come to me, yeah?"

She knew Vanessa wouldn't leave her alone tonight. After Noah had walked out, and Debbie had gone to see Sarah, and she had fed Ryan sufficient coffee and reassurance to be able to send him back to Irene, Charity had called her, wrecked, empty and defeated. Vanessa knew what today had been, how much she had borne. And she answered the call. 

She had arrived almost immediately and Charity needed her. For comfort. To be soothed. Loved. To be pulled close until she could feel the warmth of life again. And for Vanessa to hold her bruised and battered heart until it mended.

But for now she was done with emotions. She was already naked under her silk robe when Vanessa arrived and she wasted no time in getting her upstairs, undressed and under the sheets. Where she fell on her, frantic, rough and dangerous. 

Charity was physically insistent and emotionally vacant. Vanessa mirrored her, responding to Charity's urgent carnality with liquified heat, breathless want and ravenous hunger, her silent surrender assuring Charity of her love in more ways than words ever could. 

They fucked, hard. Passionately. Fleshly and animalistic. Like their lives depended on it. Which maybe they did. Their sticky bodies moving together in time, then against each other, defying the natural beat. Rising and falling, cleaving to one other, shuddering out their pain, more from necessity than pleasure. A brutal, ruthless search for release to purge their souls of the darkness.

They both craved respite from the emotional turmoil that had characterised their lives for months now, which had peaked today. Exhausting though it was, they knew that it wasn't the highest summit they would scale before this journey was complete. So to close down their minds and give themselves over to pure physical lust brought a much needed reprieve from the seemingly never-ending plod of the upward trail. 

Vanessa met Charity's wanton demands with compassion. Where Charity was rough she stayed gentle. Where Charity pushed she remained still. Where Charity denied, she allowed. And after it was over, when they were spent, when they clung together, panting and heaving, they could start to feel the world turn again and find each other once more. 

They lay still, except for Vanessa's hand caressing the back of Charity's head buried in her shoulder. Weaving slow circles in her hair, reminding them both that they were alive.

"You ok?" she asked, finally.

Charity raised her head to meet Vanessa's gaze. Her eyes told Vanessa everything, and nothing. Charity lowered her head back onto Vanessa's chest.

"I don't know how much more of this I can take."

"I know," replied Vanessa, playing with the roots of Charity's hair.

"Debs said she wanted to lie down and give up, you know, over Sarah. It was only Jack that was stopping her."

"Do you feel like that?"

"No. I've never felt like that. I've always just kept going. And fighting. Moving onto the next thing. I don't think I've ever stopped for long enough to think about, you know, giving up. The anger. The fear. The emptiness. Kept me going."

"Do you still feel those things?"

Charity lifted her head and gave Vanessa a faint smile. "Not so much now. Well, yeah, they don't go away, do they," she corrected herself. "But there are other things too. That get in the way."

"What things?"

Charity gave a ghost of a laugh, dropping back down so that her eyes were shielded from Vanessa's. "Maybe I'm tired of running. I'm slowing down, starting to appreciate the view." She squeezed Vanessa's hip and sighed. "I'm so tired of fighting, Ness."

"Its funny," she continued, "Next week I'm facing my biggest fear, in court. And I'm scared. But not for me. I'm not scared of him any more. I've been heard, believed. So him being found guilty or not doesn't really matter. But I'm supposed to protect my family - Ryan, Noah, Debs. All of them. This'll hurt them. I'll hurt them."

"Charity." Vanessa increased the pressure of her hand circling in Charity's hair. "This isn't about anyone else. You have to do it for you. Your family loves you and wants you to find peace. Not doing it will hurt them more. Because it will hurt you more. You do get that, don't you?" 

Charity sighed. "I guess. Can't back out now anyway. Not when I've got you yapping at my heels." She pinched Vanessa's hip and smiled when Vanessa whelped and slapped her on the arm.

She lifted her head again. "Come here." She kissed Vanessa's mouth for the first time that evening. Slowly. With care. She paused momentarily, eyes closed, holding her lips against Vanessa's. Then she broke away, exhaled and lowered her head back onto Vanessa's chest.

They remained quiet then. Alone with their thoughts. Drifting off. Finally Vanessa stirred.

"Whatever you do, whatever happens, you won't let me down, you know."

Charity smiled against her shoulder, pressing a kiss into it.

"That's why I'm gonna do it, Babe."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to write a piece that had no extraneous words in it, just the essence of the story. Let me know if it works.


	15. Ireland

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charity tells Vanessa she's booked them a holiday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Silly fluff for a Monday morning. Just cuz I can.
> 
> I know their relationship is meant to have moved on now but I like to think that they still can't keep their hands off each other when they are alone.

'You at home?'

'Yep'

'Pop the kettle on, I'll be there in 10. Got a proposition for you.'

Vanessa smiled as she put her phone back in her pocket and wondered if the jolt she got in her stomach whenever Charity chose her would ever stop. She hoped it wouldn't. Going into the kitchen and filling the kettle she wondered what Charity was up to now. She didn't have to wait long.

"Hey," Charity burst into the house and made a beeline for Vanessa, grabbing her by the waist and spinning her round into a kiss. Which took a little while actually as they hadn't seen each other for a day or so and had missed the proximity. Not that they'd ever admit that. To each other, at least. In words, anyway. They themselves knew it very well. And they did tell each other, in their own way. As they were doing right now.

"Mmmmmm." Charity narrowed her eyes as she pulled back and studied Vanessa. "Wanna take this upstairs?"

Vanessa slapped her on the arm. "Charity, it's the middle of the day. You didn't come here for that."

"I always come here for that, Babe," Charity grinned, let go of Vanessa and plopped herself down on the sofa. "Make us a brew then."

Vanessa did as she was bid then sat down next to Charity. "So?" 

"Babe?"

"To what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Do I need a reason? To come and see my girlfriend. Is my glorious company not enough?"

"Of course it is," Vanessa leaned in for a kiss. "Always. But your message...."

"All in good time, Babe," Charity kissed her again, as Vanessa wondered if she could ever get enough of Charity Dingle. 

"Hmmm," Vanessa eyed her suspiciously as Charity reached over to pick up her tea and take a sip, trying (and failing) not to squirm under Vanessa's scrutiny. "You're in a good mood," she said, changing tack. It would clearly take a bit of effort to get Charity to reveal her secrets.

"Yeah, well, its all going alright, isn't it? Today." They could only measure themselves on a daily basis at the moment, with so much stress and turmoil embroilling them. "Noah went to school this morning without a murmur," she continued, "Sarah is stabilising and Irene has agreed for me to see Ryan. After my amazing intervention."

"Ah," Vanessa nodded sagely. "So that's what this is. The United Nations want you to go and sort out the Middle East and you need me to come with you. For protection."

"No, Babe. You can't be my bodyguard. International rules say you're not allowed to punch below the waist." She waved her hand to indicate Vanessa's diminuitive height.

"Since when have you been bothered with what you're allowed to do or not?" Vanessa was laughing now, the big happy bubble inside her set to burst at any minute.

"Ugh. Since some prim and proper moralistic vet got me to start doing things the right way instead of the Charity Dingle way." 

"Hardly," Vanessa sobered for a minute. "I don't want to change you, Charity. You know that."

"I know, Babe," Charity rubbed her arm reassuringly. "But thinking before I act, that can't be a bad thing, right?"

"I'll let you know, when it happens," Vanessa had lightened up again. "So come on then, out with it."

"What?"

"Your big scheme. That you want to tell me about."

"Oh, right." Charity looked down into her cup and fidgeted, suddenly unsure. "Well, I thought, it might be nice, um, you and, um, no biggie, um, just if you fancied..."

"What, Charity?" Vanessa leaned in and popped her finger under Charity's chin to lift her head so that she could look her in the eye. "Just tell me."

"Well, I wondered if you and Johnny wanted to come on holiday. With us. The boys and me. I thought it would be nice to get away for a few...." she was unable to say any more as Vanessa had grabbed her by the front of her shirt and pulled her into a kiss, dragging her down onto the sofa so that Charity was on top of her, kissing her fiercely. 

"Wow," said Charity, after a time. "Is that a yes, then?"

"Yes, Charity, that's a yes. A big yes."

"Good. Cos I've already booked it."

"What? When?" Vanessa pushed Charity off her and sat up.

"Tomorrow. We leave tomorrow, Babe."

"What? What happened to thinking before you act?"

"Well I just said it was a good idea. Not that I was doing it."

"Tomorrow." Vanessa jumped off the sofa and started pacing the floor, chuntering to herself. "I'll need to pack, get the suitcase out of the loft. Where's Johnny's passport?" 

"Will we need Passports?" she shot at Charity.

"Uh, yeah, I think so." Charity got up and walked over to Vanessa, pulling her into her arms. "Calm down, dear. Its only a holiday. And actually, more important than packing is thanking me for my brilliance in organising it." She leaned in and kissed her.

"Oh. Is that right?" Vanessa smiled as Charity nodded, still kissing her. "Well, I'm not sure I can do that down here." She manoeuvred them towards the stairs. They were quite adept now, at finding Vanessa's bedroom without breaking their embrace and started their ascent towards it.

"Will I need a bikini?" Vanessa pulled her mouth from Charity's, halfway up the stairs.

"Oh yes, Babe," pulling her back in.

"Where are we going?"

Charity leaned down and whispered in her ear. Vanessa stopped what she was doing, halted their progress up the stairs and looked at Charity like she was mad.

"IRELAND???"


	16. pulling pint-sized vets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charity sneaks round to Vanessa's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So its all been a bit heavy and angsty lately so I thought I'd lighten it up a bit. It's fluffy and unnecessary but it's done now. Enjoy.

Vanessa opened the front door and Charity burst through, pinning her against the wall, pressing along the full length of their bodies and kissing her deeply, her hands immediately finding Vanessa's shirt and attacking the buttons.

"Mmmm. You have a key. You don't need to knock," Vanessa gasped out between kisses.

"Yeah, but then I can't do this," Charity replied with a dirty grin, kissing her again. "I've snuck out of the pub. I have about half an hour. I want you. I feel like I haven't had you for ever."

"Charity, It was yesterday!"

"Do you want to spend this time quibbling with me or would you prefer to do what I came here for?"

"Oh well, if that's the choice - I'll just ask my Dad and Megan to leave."

Charity pulled up short, letting go of Vanessa and stepping back, her mouth gaping wide and her eyes a picture of abject horror.

"Only joking," Vanessa chuckled. "I'm on my own." She stepped into Charity's space, grabbing her waist and pulling her close to lean up and kiss her again.

"Hrumph," Charity's irritation was short-lived as she found Vanessa's shirt buttons and continued where she had left off. Releasing the last one she lifted her hands to Vanessa's shoulders and slipped her shirt onto the floor, leaving it in a heap by the door. 

Vanessa grabbed Charity by the lapels of her jacket and tugged her into the living room toward the stairs. As she mounted the first step Charity shifted her grasp, cupping one hand at the back of Vanessa's head and resting the other in the small of her back, pushing against her gently to lay her down against the treads. As she lay over her, she shifted her her hands to unclasp Vanessa's bra and pull it over her arms, casting it over the bannisters, sending it flying into the kitchen.

In response Vanessa hustled Charity's jacket off her shoulders and swiped it onto the stair next to her. She dropped her hands to Charity's waist, pulling her shirt out of her jeans and lifting it over her head. They broke apart momentarily while Charity lifted her arms to help Vanessa rid her of it. As it soared across the living room to rest on a sofa cushion they came together again, kissing hard and deep, as Vanessa divested Charity of her bra and flicked it away, neither of them noticing it land on the TV.

Charity moaned long and hard into Vanessa's mouth. "Oh, Babe. You taste so good." She bent her leg at the knee, reaching behind her to pull off her boot, flinging it against the sofa. She repeated the action with the other leg, absent-mindedly putting a bit more oomph into the throw resulting in it sailing over the sofa and bouncing under the desk. Her socks followed, landing randomly on the living room floor. She snaked her hands around Vanessa's back to pull her tighter. 

"Uh." Vanessa let out a small involuntary cry of discomfort at the angle she was lying so Charity, in a move that seemed to defy gravity, managed to pull them both upright without breaking their embrace. They continued their journey up the stairs, lost in each other's mouths, with Charity's hands at Vanessa's fly, popping the button, lowering the zip and pushing her jeans over her hips. She brought them to a standstill, broke away from Vanessa's lips and squatted down to finish removing the offending trousers while nibbling her tummy, just below her belly button. 

"Oh, Babe. Going commando. On a weekday. Hot," Charity breathed into Vanessa's skin.

Vanessa gave a dirty laugh. "I know. Better sensations when I'm thinking of you."

"Uuuhhh," Charity exhaled as she draped Vanessa's jeans over the rail and raised herself up again to reconnect their mouths. "No wonder you're always doing so much washing."

Vanessa laughed and slapped Charity's arm. "It's worth it," She smiled into Charity's mouth and wrapped her arms around her, forcing her body as hard against Charity's as she could. They stayed that way for a while, exploring, tasting, then Charity got them on the move again.

She backed Vanessa up the stairs, manoeuvring her around the bannister and shoving her up against the wall next to the bedroom door. Vanessa's hands dropped to Charity's waist and undid the button of her jeans, pulling down the fly and running her hands down her hips to lower them and her knickers over her thighs. Charity shuffled her legs to get her jeans past her calves and stepped out of them, kicking both garments behind her onto the landing. 

She grasped Vanessa's hands, interlocking their fingers and pushing them back against the wall, above her head, as she pressed against her, their hips grinding their loins together. "Jesus. Get in that bedroom, now," Charity gasped and pulled back from Vanessa. Vanessa turned and backed into the bedroom, leading Charity by the hands. She reversed until she felt the bed against the backs of her calves and she fell, pulling Charity down on top of her. 

 

Some 20 minutes later they lay beside each other on their backs, fingers intertwined and legs tangled, panting to regain their breath and slow their hearts. 

"Wow," Vanessa turned her head to look at Charity with a grin. "Is it me, or are we getting even better at that?"

"I think we've always been pretty good at it, but the vast amount of practice we've put in is obviously paying off." Charity smiled as she lifted her hand to brush Vanessa's hair off her cheek. "Hmmm," she sighed contentedly.

She lifted her head and looked around the bedroom, thinking about having to get back to work. "Vanessa. Where the fuck are our clothes?"

Vanessa's laugh gurgled deep in her throat. "They're strewn all over the house, Charity. It'll probably take you longer to find them than all this took," waving her hand above them.

"Hmmm. That ratio doesn't seem quite right." She sighed. "Wish we could leave them there and stay here all afternoon."

"Me too. Are you sure you have to get back?"

"Yes, Babe. Duty calls." Charity made to sit up but was forced back down by Vanessa rolling on top of her. 

"You sure?" Vanessa kissed her. "You really sure?" kissing her harder. "Really, really sure?" as her tongue snuck into Charity's mouth.

"Well, I am pretty accomplished at pulling pints. Pulling pint-sized vets though, I guess I could use a bit more practice."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> say it if you mean it.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. I'd love your feedback.


End file.
